More on What ‘The Cancer’ showed me – on this day one year ago they noticed a distortion on my 3D mammogram and that usually means something nasty is hiding there – sure enough the little fucker was hiding at the back in amongst some cycts.
So on this day one year on here is the next bit of What ‘The Cancer’ showed me –
The Cancer has shown me I am the eternal optimist. The thing about life is … it can be filled with joy even at the blackest of times. This is how I work, automatically my brain goes to the positives – well the cancer isn’t as bad as my mum’s was, it isn’t as bad as my sister’s was and she is here and kicking goals seventeen years later! My feelings go to the positives – well I have family and friends who love me and want to look after me … I don’t go black first I go colour and light and celebration of life first.
The Cancer has shown me that the black can sneak up on you and if you aren’t careful about it, it will take you over. The black is frightening, it could overwhelm you, take over your everything if you aren’t careful to put it aside. But should it always be put aside, should you do something about it? But then if you do something about it and think about it more it might make it happen, that thing that causes the black, that thing I cannot write down or even say. No I am not going to do anything but put it aside, it cannot take my time, my thoughts, my life.