… continues … second treatment, second allergic reaction, my body is fighting, screaming as these poisonous chemicals enter it, 5mls is all it takes.
My breathing, heat, rainbow stars flashing in my eyes … grabbing for hands, squeezing, trying to focus on that rather than what I know is coming. Not realising I was holding two hands … in a daze, breathing, big gulps feeling the pain, the spasms as they start to move out from my spine … along … ouch … breathing in and out through the spasms … feeling them build … the longest time … slowed time … grabbing hard so hard at hands squeezing, looking straight ahead trying to get through … my body fights but my mind knows this will pass and that my little chemical friends need to be allowed in.
A 10 hour day, huge and exhausting.
In spite of the reaction, now almost predictable the morning was fun, filled with laughter and chatter and quizzes and crosswords. I am lucky to have my friends the closest two each volunteering or saying yes when asked to travel through one of these days with me.
Lying here four days later I know I’ll wake tomorrow fatigued, exhausted, wrecked before the day begins, I feel my knees aching already.
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